• Posted 12/19/2024.
    =====================

    I am still waiting on my developer to finish up on the Classifieds Control Panel so I can use it to encourage members into becoming paying members. Google Adsense has become a real burden on the viewing of this site, but honestly it is the ONLY source of income now that keeps it afloat. I tried offering disabling the ads being viewed by paying members, but apparently that is not enough incentive. Quite frankly, Google Adsense has dropped down to where it barely brings in enough daily to match even a single paid member per day. But it still gets the bills paid. But at what cost?

    So even without the classifieds control panel being complete, I believe I am going to have to disable those Google ads completely and likely disable some options here that have been free since going to the new platform. Like classified ad bumping, member name changes, and anything else I can use to encourage this site to be supported by the members instead of the Google Adsense ads.

    But there is risk involved. I will not pay out of pocket for very long during this last ditch experimental effort. If I find that the membership does not want to support this site with memberships, then I cannot support your being able to post your classified ads here for free. No, I am not intending to start charging for your posting ads here. I will just shut the site down and that will be it. I will be done with FaunaClassifieds. I certainly don't need this, and can live the rest of my life just fine without it. If I see that no one else really wants it to survive neither, then so be it. It goes away and you all can just go elsewhere to advertise your animals and merchandise.

    Not sure when this will take place, and I don't intend to give any further warning concerning the disabling of the Google Adsense. Just as there probably won't be any warning if I decide to close down this site. You will just come here and there will be some sort of message that the site is gone, and you have a nice day.

    I have been trying to make a go of this site for a very long time. And quite frankly, I am just tired of trying. I had hoped that enough people would be willing to help me help you all have a free outlet to offer your stuff for sale. But every year I see less and less people coming to this site, much less supporting it financially. That is fine. I tried. I retired the SerpenCo business about 14 years ago, so retiring out of this business completely is not that big if a step for me, nor will it be especially painful to do. When I was in Thailand, I did not check in here for three weeks. I didn't miss it even a little bit. So if you all want it to remain, it will be in your hands. I really don't care either way.

    =====================
    Some people have indicated that finding the method to contribute is rather difficult. And I have to admit, that it is not all that obvious. So to help, here is a thread to help as a quide. How to become a contributing member of FaunaClassifieds.

    And for the record, I will be shutting down the Google Adsense ads on January 1, 2025.
  • Responding to email notices you receive.
    **************************************************
    In short, DON'T! Email notices are to ONLY alert you of a reply to your private message or your ad on this site. Replying to the email just wastes your time as it goes NOWHERE, and probably pisses off the person you thought you replied to when they think you just ignored them. So instead of complaining to me about your messages not being replied to from this site via email, please READ that email notice that plainly states what you need to do in order to reply to who you are trying to converse with.

FML FML FML

But on a serious note, if anyone ever treats you, more importantly, your child like that, kick him out, be done with him and everything about him.
 
smb2585 said:
EDIT -- sometimes i think the only reason i let you stay is because when you leave i know the snakes go with you :'(
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I hear you....I understand....and i'm right there with you...it's very scary....I hope everything works out for you. Lots of love and best wishes!!!
 
Sorry to hear you're in this situation.

Hopefully it will get better and you can figure out what to do. :)
 
Stephanie,

I don't know if I'm understanding all you are saying, but it looks like some of what you are writing about is money, which is one of the two or three most common things couples fight about.
Do you love him?
Do you think you can make it work, if he meets you halfway (not saying he will, just if)
I hope for better things for you, and that you find happiness somehow.
 
Sending prayers, hon.

I was where you are about 33 years ago...except that he abused me in every way possible...financially, emotionally, physically... And he cheated with my best friend, too.

My GOD-was it THAT long??? It seems like yesterday.

I'm praying for the VERY BEST for you and your daughter!!
 
I'm sorry Steph! I know where you are coming from. Stand your ground and make sure you let him know how you feel so that way it doesn't come as a shock if you do decide to part ways. It's hard for boys to realize when to become men sometimes.
 
So sorry for what you're going through. There's a fine, almost invisible line between hurt and anger. But there's a child involved, and that makes a huge difference. If she truly hates being with him, please weigh her feelings heavily. (I know you already know this). I would assume you two love each other, but does he love your daughter? That should be a deal breaker. I wish the best for you and your daughter. And I'll bet there are folks here who could send snakes your way if he leaves with them!

Noelle
 
The main issue is generally money.. partly because when we do the math and I pay what I pay out compared to him including our non-mutual bills it looks like he has more bills but that is in part because of medical bills he pays monthly due to an accident he had 5 yrs ago where he had no insurance and was on life support and such... other issues involve kids (mine and his) whereas he plays no active role in his sons life but plays active role in my daughters but thinks she should be raised the way he was versus the way i was raised.. and there is no compromise..its either his way or my way and generally its my way because i feel his ways are too harsh?? Other things include his lack of compassion for anyone or anything other than himself... and his toys... and <b>his</b> snakes.. since he has thousands of dollars in savings (partly because he doesnt have to pay much for our mutual expenses and gets to put money up) and he buys what he wants and in turn sells it at a later date for more... which i have no problem with if he would just pitch in more... sitting at home playing black ops or riding your jet ski or motorcycle while my mom watched my daughter because she hates staying home with him and im at work and asking me what IM making for dinner while you have done NOTHING at home.. ticks me off... i am the sole care provider for my kid in the house... he does not help with her homework, laundry, or anything... i have to BRIBE him to go to her cheerleading stuff... because hes just not into it... shes told me before that she would be sad if he wasnt around but she would eventually be ok... its just had to deal with it because as strong as i think i am... sometimes i think im not strong enough to deal with that :( maybe im just better off being alone... but i dont like being alone :(
 
Honey-NONE of us like to be alone.

That's what sets us apart from most species of animals!

But you have to learn to be your own best friend before you fall for anyone else!!

Love yourself for the person you are, and learn to love your "down-time".

Do things YOU want to do. See movies you might give up because he doesn't want to see them. Go someplace you've always wanted to go with your kids.

If you feel like a salad for breakfast...go for it!! If you want soup and a sandwich at 7 pm for dinner, what's wrong with that?? If you want 4 courses of dessert for dinner...HELL YEAH!! I don't recommend doing this all the time, but INDULGE!!

Stop putting your wants and needs on hold because he is so freaking selfish!!

Then-when you've become your own best friend, you're ready to be with someone else, and you won't ever put yourself last again!!

Learn who you really are-outside of a relationship!!

And let that person guide and protect you from another selfish guy!!

Tell him to STICK IT!!
 
I was scared of being alone too, but I got over it and now I'm alone. Best thing that's happened to me and my daughter. Her father is still involved in her life, but we aren't together any longer.

I hope you FIND yourself. Once you find yourself, you'll be going on the right path to figure things out. You need to put you and your daughter first, him be damned!
 
You can't expect someone to have an active role in childrens lives that are not theirs. It never works out that way especially as the kids get older they realize, hey your not my parent don't tell me whatdo to.

And if your only problem with him is money issues and other superficial problems, maybe you shouldn't be in a relationship. You've got to be happy with yourself before you let someone else in.
 
Iloverhacs said:
You can't expect someone to have an active role in childrens lives that are not theirs. It never works out that way especially as the kids get older they realize, hey your not my parent don't tell me whatdo to.
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Wow, lived sheltered much? I was raised just fine and my stepdad played a far greater role than my bio-dad. :rolleyes:
 
I agree with Nick and thank you for that comment... My dad raised my brother just fine and my brother calls MY dad "Dad" and HIS bio-dad is "Kevin" so that comment was very uncalled for. Also some of the greatest Dads that I know are dads to OTHER peoples kids... This is a very common thing in the current year with children being raised by step parents...

As for superficial... this is the SOUND OFF forum and if i want to vent or gripe about MY issues I can... if you have no polite advice or any sort of information that may help me resolve the issue I am having, I am asking You kindly to keep those comments to yourself... Yes i am still young and learning the ropes of life... but I do the best I can with what i have... and have found great advice and support from every comment on here... except yours.
 
Iloverhacs said:
You can't expect someone to have an active role in childrens lives that are not theirs. It never works out that way especially as the kids get older they realize, hey your not my parent don't tell me whatdo to.
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Wow, what a blanket statement. My daughter's "father" is not her real father, but he plays a bigger role in her life than the "DONOR" does. Her "father" and I aren't together, but he damn sure plays a big role in her life. She hasn't known any other "father' in her life other than him and she calls him daddy, and he thinks of her as his real daughter.

So I don't know how you can blanket statement something so serious. :rolleyes:
 
smb2585 said:
learning the ropes of life
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Stephanie,
I'm still learning too. So we are glad you are here, and asking.
BTW, I'm letting you in on a secret: I've learned a lot from this particular site. Not only about reptiles although advice was plentiful and helpful when I asked. But also about people, others and myself. If you don't ask, you'll never learn.
 
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